Couldn't sleep very well last night. Which is very unlike me...but my youngest was up, said he had a nightmare about "I Am Legend" the movie we saw last weekend. I thin he and I were "awake" about the same time, maybe I was just picking up on his "plight". I think I took my adrenal suppliment too late in the evening too...that seems to happen..I wake in the night when I take it too late at night...I'm suppose to be taking it in the a.m. and at noon. My heart was racing last night and I just couldn't quiet my brain. I worry too much I suppose about things I have no control over...I don't feel like I'm in control of my health at the moment. I'm working on changing that.
Roger is out of town for the week, I miss him when he's gone.
Suicide is something I think about from time to time...not that I'd ever really go through with it but the thought of not being in anymore "discomfort" or having to worry about whether my heart will stop on one of these episodes, where will it all end up? I don't know...just seems like this life, this time, has been a huge struggle...when does it get easy??
I don't stay in that "space" for too long, I'm a very positive, happy person most of the time. But I am always and forever asking questions...:-) it's me.
No diet change yet...I'm just gonna have to DO IT as NIKE says...and jump off that cliff and not look back...it's WHAT I NEED to do...why so hard? why the resistance??
When I'm ready I'll be posting here most days on what I'm eating, and NOT eating...the first two things are soda and fast food...must go..both of them, IF I want to be healthy again.
Be well....
About Me
- Amy
- Hi, I'm Amy. I'm on a quest for health at this point in my life. I feel pretty good most days, had no idea my health was going down the path it is going down. I'm changing that though. I own 4 different and very unique businesses, I have 5 kids, and a highschool sweetheart for a hubby. Want to know more just ask me :-)